You know you’re a mother when…
… you wipe your child’s nose with your fingers and then wipe it on your shirt ’cause you can’t be bothered to go get a tissue (or you are somewhere where one isn’t available).
… you hear a crash but don’t go to investigate until (or unless) you hear a cry.
…you have wet wipes and an extra diaper in your purse even when the children aren’t with you.
… you hear the baby stirring but wait to hear a few cries before you get up.
… you can pick out you child’s cry in a room full of noisy children.
… you can block out fights and arguments that don’t require your intervention just to get a few moments to check your mail.
… you go to bed with one person (hubby) and wake up with four (or however many still get into your bed).
… you serve your children snack foods for lunch because you are too tired to fix a meal. What’s more, they want to eat it every day, calling it the best lunch ever.
… you know ice cream can solve any problem, for the children or you.
… hearing things like “hairbandaid”, “milks”, and “baby puppy” makes you smile. (Courtesy of Lila: “hairbandaid” is hairband, “milks” is breasts (as in “Mommy, those are your milks because that is where the baby gets milk from”), and baby puppy just makes a puppy sound cuter.)
… you can change a diaper in most any position, and in the dark.
… you know the secrets to “mommy magic” and use it on your kids.
… you actually do have eyes in the back of your head.
… you have fooled your children into believing that you are all-seeing and all-knowing, and you love every minute of it.
… you wish Mother’s Day was actually about you.
Am I the only one wishing Mother’s Day was a mandatory mommy holiday?