Those Little Worriesome Things …

Yesterday I was reading a post over at Literal Mom that got me thinking. It was about how as new moms we tend to make a big deal over unimportant issues regarding our babies, thus making it obvious that we are “baby” or inexperienced moms.

At the end she asked people to share their experiences, what their worries were as new moms and how they think about the same issues now. I answered, then gave it some more thought. I realised that new or soon-to-be-new moms have lots of fears and worries, and that perhaps if I share some of the ones I faced, it may help you be a little more prepared.

Before I had kids, I worked as a fulltime nanny/caregiver/teacher for two adorable rascals, one boy and one girl, 7 weeks apart in age. I spent almost 3 years with them, from the time they were babies, and thought I knew what to expect when I had my own. Well, I knew the basics, but nothing can prepare you for the worries you face with your own child. Why? Well, when you care for someone elses child, your concerns stop with your workday. Their parents have full concern and responsibility for them; you don’t.

Like every other new mom out there, I was unprepared to face fears and worries when Logan was born. So many small things can scare you if you aren’t aware of them. My goal now is to try to help you alay those fears so you can feel a little more in control with your baby.

Ok, so here goes. Some of the things I worried about when I had Logan … well, I have to admit I worried that he would even be born. I had a rather unstable pregnancy, spotting monthly from the third month on. (See the page Logan’s Story for more details.)
Once he was born, new worries surfaced.

– I used to worry that I might smother him while I was sleeping since he was so tiny.


Logan’s first time in a cart.



– I vowed that I would never turn my back on him in public, even for a second. (Once when he was 7 or 8 months old, we were shopping and he was sitting in the cart. My husband came from parking the car and took Logan out of the cart and walked a distance away where I couldn’t see them in the short 2 seconds I had my back turned. Scared the hell out of me, thinking he had been stolen.)
– I never let him play on the floor unless I had just swept and mopped it.

– I made sure he never put anything from the floor in his mouth. I kept his bottles and pacifiers sterilized and his toys off the floor.
– I made sure everything he touched was clean, and that if it wasn’t clean, he didn’t touch it.

Fast forward 3 1/2 years. I have two more babies and find said fears slipping away. I do remember that around the time Scarlett was born, I read an article about the dangers of letting a baby sleep on their tummy. It scared me so bad that for weeks I only put her on her side or back, but it wasn’t until I remembered that Logan and Lila had both slept that way as small babies that my fear subsided. Why it hit me after 3 kids I don’t know. I guess we are vulnerable to fears no matter how many kids we have.

But we also reach a point where we see that most of these worries and fears are just that – things that we don’t actually need to stress over. Now, with Scarlett, she plays on the floor all day long, even though I only sweep daily and mop (at best) twice a week. She regularly finds stuff on the floor to put in her mouth and I just keep pulling it out, but I don’t freak out. Actually, all my kids will pick up and eat food they drop on the floor, even on the balcony (but I draw the line at stuff that falls on the ground outside). They have yet to get sick from such things.

I stopped sterilizing stuff for her after about 3 months, she plays with the older kids toys that haven’t been washed in forever. She has even chewed bugs and, worst of all, poop. But I think all babies try that at least once. I’m sure Logan and Lila did too, I just can’t remember it.

As for the other worries, well, I have never smothered my babies and all of them have slept in my bed. I found that letting them sleep on their tummies allowed them to sleep longer, since when on their backs they would jerk their arms and legs and wake themselves up.

I still don’t let them out of my sight for long in public, but I don’t freak out about it like I used to. You can never be too careful with your child in public. Here in India, kidnappings for ransom or sale is all too common, especially with children who have such fair skin like mine do. I read about such things in the papers all the time. I do still worry if I can’t see where they have hidden themselves while at the park right away, or if they run around the corner, will they still be there when I get there. It happens. I shouldn’t be too hard on myself and think that now I should never worry about them at all.

As mommies, we will probably worry about our kids for the rest of our lives. But we can make sure that if we have to worry, it is about important things and not little things best left alone. So if you find yourself worrying, stop and think, is this something I really need to worry about or not? It will save you a lot of stress and your sanity in the long run.
What worries do you have (or did have) and how are you facing them?
Advertisements
Previous Post
Leave a comment

4 Comments

  1. "As mommies, we will probably worry about our kids for the rest of our lives. But we can make sure that if we have to worry, it is about important things and not little things best left alone. So if you find yourself worrying, stop and think, is this something I really need to worry about or not? It will save you a lot of stress and your sanity in the long run" – Such an awesome quote! And thanks for the shout out!

    Reply
  2. Great post! I was definitely an over-worrier as a new mom. I still am about certain things, but I think I've relaxed a bit. I think, so long as your doing your best to protect them, then the worrying doesn't help. And, my youngest has eaten both bugs and poop. 🙂

    Reply
  3. I know tons of women who swear by the book, my little sis included. I just try to go with the flow and and not stress too much. With a dozen kids, it's the only way to survive.Sandy

    Reply

Comments make me smile!

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: