P-PD is Awful!!!

Why didn’t anyone warn me this would happen? I’ve heard of post-partum depression but never had it happen before. Why this time? Why now?
Everything makes me cry. The kids know I can’t jump up to discipline them so they make me shout instead. I hate that. Logan will stand just out of my reach and say no or scream at me when I ask him to do something he doesn’t want to do. I don’t like having to shout. Why can’t I stay calm? Why are they not as obedient as they used to be?
Why is it that men don’t see when you are down and need a hug? This is one time I wish he could read my mind. I need some hugs; maybe an occasional “How are you doing? Do you need anything?” Must I say everything that I need? Do I really have to tell him that I need a hug now?
It’s awful now. I just locked them out of my room because they were playing a screaming game with each other and didn’t want to play it elsewhere. Normally their games don’t bother me but now I just can’t take it. I don’t know where Glad is; I fell asleep and he went out. His mom is here but watching them is really up to me. I woke up to Logan dumping water on my bedroom floor and Lila, who has a cold, running around naked. Just the frustration of the whole thing made me cry.
How do I get out of this? Can it stop now? I’m mad at myself for upsetting my kids; they are crying outside the door and I’m completely ignoring them. This isn’t how a mother is supposed to be. I need someone to hold me and tell me that this will pass and that soon I’ll be able to face life again.
That and maybe a big bag of chocolate.

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3 Comments

  1. You poor dear. I wish we were there to help out. First, I'd give you a big hug & kiss, then show you the enormous bag of chocolate I bought, just for you, then take the kids & do something fun with them. I know men sometimes don't see these things, but hopefully, Glad will see the need & help out. Anyway, the kids will soon grow up & grow out of some of these things. Kids are the same around the world. I suppose all I can do is pray for you. I love you, & yes, it will get better.

    Reply
  2. Thanks dad, I'm feeling better today. It's nice to get some sympathy from someone who's seen this from a guys point of view. 🙂 Yesterday I felt like I wouldn't be able to handle any more, I was so tired, but sleep can do wonders for your sanity. I'm ok now, at least at this moment. I hope this PPD won't last long.

    Reply
  3. Dad is right! love you, it will pass and you will see the light shining through, just pray for patience and you are more important then all that needs doing ,put your health first ,please and then the children will be happy 'cause mama is healing up like she needs to. Mom

    Reply

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